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BACK from the Neurosurgeon and MISERABLE...

not at the fault of the doctor. He took his time looking at the MRI films and reports I brought in. And then examined me by doing different tests.

Then he discussed what we can do. He believes that surgery is not in the picture because he does not believe there is a high enough percentage it would work and does not want to take the chance. He believes it will take 6 months to a year to go away. I just about broke out in tears. My friend and the doc said look it has been almost 6 months already.

Some things I can do is swim since it takes all the weight off my back and lose weight which we are doing now. But does not guarantee the pain will go away.

I am so sad right now because it is so hard to function. I feel bad for Aviva because I cannot do much. I am trying to stay positive and deal with it but let me tell you it is not easy.

Just a LITTLE update on the past 2 days......

Well, yesterday I had my MRI for my brain and orbits. We started the MRI sitting up and I did well for the first set of slides. But then started to move (did not realize it) and pictures were blurry. So they had me lay down. Oy vey is all I can say. It took about 1 1/2 hrs in all. After 2/3's or so of the MRI they then injected me with dye for the contrast part. I did not move the whole time except when she said I could but still basically laying still. When she said it was the last set it was a good thing, because did not think I could do anymore. That is when I started to sweat and basically was done.

So when it was over they tilt the table up to a standing position and boy I felt miserable. They helped me out and gave me some water, took a bit to feel better. Just glad it is over. Now praying it is fine!

Today was the eye doctor who is really nice. It is a follow-up from 3 weeks ago. Well, she took the pressure in my eyes...which is fine, then dilated them. Then saw Dr. Katz, and she was happy they had the mri report to be faxed to her too. She looked at my eyes said you have us a bit worried about you (oh great, just what I needed to hear), but we will take care of you. So more drops then off to get photos of my eyes to see if any changes from 3 weeks ago. She will call after Friday's appointment for a follow-up with her.

Tomorrow is the neurosurgeon, hoping to get some ideas what they can do next for the pain!

I am a bit NERVOUS.......

for tomorrow and this week. I am not nervous for the MRI...just nervous it may show something. Hoping the retina specialist has the blood test results Friday. And hoping all is fine.

Then going to the neurosurgeon Wednesday....just want to be out of pain already. Yesterday went shopping with Aviva and got back to the car in tears and so much pain. She asks me to open her soda I got her and I did and exploded all over me and the steering wheel and I just lost it. With her and myself...I yelled at her and was crying. Most of it due to the pain I just cannot take it anymore...feel like my life is on hold and cannot do anything with her anymore.

GRAINS of GRATITUDE......

Another week of summer has gone by and boy it has been very hot this week. I stayed inside enjoying the A/C.

*I am thankful to have had 2 good doc appointments this week. Both doctors were happy with my health and progress I have made. Blood pressure is normal with the help of Micardis and my Blood Sugars are doing much better.

*Aviva had a great week in camp and she is having a terrific summer...swimming twice a day and being with her friends makes her happy.

*Aviva is so excited because we leave in 2 weeks for Disney with Auntie Marie. I am just a bit worried due to my back and renting a scooter. We are going to meet up with friends who live in the area and who will be at Disney the same time as us!!! So should be fun.

*I am enjoying my class I am taking this term and have a great professor. I also registered for the fall. Taking another class on autism-Intervention for Students iwth Autism Spectrum Disorders, I am almost done with the classes for the endorsement and taking the Characteristice and Needs of Students with Developmental Disabilites. I think will really like them both.

*I am grateful to my friend Audree who will be coming with me on Wednesday to my appointment with the neurosurgeon. She is a nurse and I can use the help.

I have been tagged.......

EIGHT things you did not know about me....

1. I am a Diet Coke Addict.

2. I spent 3 years living in Mexico...in the cities of Mexico City and Cancun.

3. I love to read...and if I have the time would read a book a day.

4. I plan our Disney trips and after paid for I let Spider know when he needs to take off from work. He just says OK...which is good.

5. I want to open my own school that will be based on inclusion for children with and without disabilities.....for pre-k to 5th grade.

6. I am a really good listener....and pretty good at giving advice. Some of my friends think I should get another master's (when I finish this one first). I love to help people.

7. I cannot sleep without the TV. Spider is gone 5 nights a week doing overnights and one night he has a gig...so the TV keeps me company.

8. I do NOT like living in Florida!

Just had to say...........

HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH!!!!

13 is my lucky number, what is yours?

Finally some GOOD doctor news....

This week had appointments with the endocrinologist and cardiologist.

Tuesday was the endo. I must say it is nice to hear you are doing well. He liked how much better my blood sugars were and we talked about my back pain and therefore cannot exercise yet (helps the blood sugars). But he was happy and do not have to go back for 6 weeks.

Then yesterday my eye doctor called in the evening...a surprise. She wanted to see how my visit to the retina specialist went Friday. Told her I had an eye scan and then an angiogram type test for the eyes. And explained he saw that the optic nerve was enlarged and there was a problem with the blood vessels and blood in the eye. And he is sending me for an MRI for the brain and orbits with and without contrast. So she was happy to hear that and will see her Tuesday. What a nice surprise that she called.

Then today off to the cardiologist....He is really nice and funny too. My blood pressure was good 120/78...normally a little lower but I have been in a lot more pain this week with my back so that can be it. He was happy with everything so we chatted a bit and then said see you in 6 months.

Always nice to hear the good news after the past few weeks. Done with doctors till next week.
July 16-MRI

July 17-Eye Doctor

July 18 Neurosurgeon

July 20-Retina Specialist.

Have to reschedule neurologist same time as eye doctor.

GRAINS of GRATITUDE...

What a funny child I have lately. We are driving in the car and she tells me when she is 18 she knows how she will break up with a boyfriend. I said, oh really how and she goes very seriously, I will DUMP HIM. Gave me a good laugh and I go how will you know how do it. Aviva goes I will practice. Then she asked me later on if she can have TABLE TOPS for dinner. I said what and she repeated TABLE TOPS. I go you mean TATER TOTS. She definitely is fun to be around, and has many funny things to say, Makes my day.

Aviva has really improved in swimming since lessons last summer. Yesterday Spider said she was swimming like a fish in the deep end. And now has been in her bathing suit all day waiting for daddy to get home.

Spider has been training for a new position and studying really hard and working tons of hours. But passed his tests with all A's. I am very proud of him.

I still have more doctor appointments this week but thankfully just follow-ups with the endocrinologist and the cardiologist. Must say my blood pressure has been great at about an average of 110/50. It has been a tough few weeks with me and just hoping for a nice smooth week.

TODAY is Friday.......

so for me it must mean another doctor's visit. Yes I had an appointment with a retina specialist today and it was very long.

I was there for almost 4 hours. The first hour or so they working on insurance, have no clue why when they had all my info ahead of time.

Then the nurse/tech finally called me in and asks lots of questions, takes the pressure in my eyes, tests them and then dilates them.

OK now off to another waiting room to wait till eyes are dilated and then some.

Finally called into see the doctor. He checks the eyes and looks some more. Then says my optic nerve is inflamed and there is blood in my eyes and he needs to find out why.

OK back to the waiting room and have to give permission for this test where they inject dye into my arm to get to my eyes, so I do...wait some more.

Called back by the eye tech who first takes some more info and then does an eye scan. Then off to do the other test like an angiogram to see where the dye goes. She started to inject the dye in my right arm but blood vessel would not cooperate and it hurt so over to the left arm and it worked. She got some good pictures and then we were finished.

Back to the room so the doctor can view the pictures. So finally we are getting some where.

The doc comes in and says it seems there is something going on and the blood is not going where it is suppose to and there is blood in all 4 quadrants of my eye. So now he wants to send me for blood work...a few different tests. And then, an MRI of my brain and orbits with and without contrast.

So will call Monday to schedule the MRI and go to the primary to give blood---oy vey will it ever end.

What an amazing group of YOUNG MEN....

I started watching Nightline last night and I am so glad. They had a story about this boy named Darius and how his group of friends came and rallied around him to try to get MTV to Pimp his Wheelchair.

See he was born with Muscular Dystrophy and went to a Special Needs camp for many years and ran into this boy at the camp. This young man and a group of other young men took Darius on a cross country journey. They made the trip into a documentry called Darius Goes West. It has been in many film festivels and won many awards.

I had tears in my eyes through out this piece. It is a must read and see.

Check out how one company benefits by hiring individuals with disablities.....

You have to check out this video that was on the NBC Nightly News tonight. It is a great story of inclusion and how one company works to give jobs with individuals with disabilities. It plays after the advertising.

What a great thing they are doing!!!!!!! Makes me very happy to see stories like this.

The MANY FACES of AVIVA..........

Aviva takes her self portrait!

Aviva and Dawn being silly

GRAINS of GRATITUDE

What a busy week with doc appointments and my best friend was here visiting.

I had a great week long visit with my best friend....we did not do much but she relaxed and enjoyed the Florida sun. We went out for lunches and dinners and had a really nice time together. She came to my doc appts with me. She made it safely home!

Finally got my Jeep back on Tuesday, such a relief. It is nice to be driving with A/C again.

Four weeks from today we will be in Disney World......I will be renting a scooter and still going to have a great time. It is Marie's (my SIL) first time there and I want it to be great. Aviva is ready to go today!!

I am still in a lot of pain with my back but let me tell you what a help Aviva was yesterday. We had to go to the grocery store so we came home and I was really hurting. One bags handle broke and then climbing the stairs another one broke and I started to cry. She came and got it from and put it by the front door. I put my bags by the door too and went back down for more. While I was getting the bags Aviva carried them all inside and put them on the counter and got the rest I carried up on the second trip and then got me my ice pack. She truly is a very sensitive and loving child.

I am just thankful for my husband and daughter they keep me going...I have been in pain since February and it has not been easy. But they are there to take care and love me. And I can not ask for anything more.

It has been a while an UPDATE is in order...

We have been busy this week....my best friend from NY has been visiting and she is leaving tomorrow.

She came to 3 doctor appointments with me this week.

First the eye doctor...needed to go being diabetic. What a nice doc she was..took her time and explained everything to Dawn and I. She said my eyesight is good. But being diabetic you have to worry about retinapothy. I do not have that but the blood vessels around the retina were inflamed and that was because my sugars were fluctuated. There is a name for it but can not remember. So going to a retina specialist July 5th and then back to her July 17th.

The next day off to the pain specialist in the morning. I knew there was not much he can do after the facet block did not work. His recommendation was to see a neurosurgeon.

Then in the afternoon we were off to the orthopedist. I was not expecting much since we had not look with injections. So he too recommended I see a neurosurgeon as well. He gave me some names, of course none were on the insurance. So faxed him alist and he recommended too. So my good friend Audree will come with me on July 18th at 9:30 am!

That is about it for now.....next week check up with the cardiologist on the 5th!

GRAINS of GRATITUDE...

It has been a very interesting week...went from feeling pain in my back to absolute agony on Thurs and Fri and back to pain I was feeling before the procedure last Wednesday...not sure what will go on. But going to the pain doc and orthopedist on Wednesday!

My best friend came in from NY yesterday and we have not see each other in almost 2 years, since she got married. It was so good to see her. It was like she was just here. Accept Aviva is much more loving with her, like being her shadow. We just hung out last night had chinese and watched a Lifetime TV movie....like old times. Now she took Aviva to the pool because my back is in bad shape from going to the grocery store.

Aviva had another great week at camp. She comes home so happy and you would think tired but not my child. She is very excited to go to the Marlins baseball game Thursday and then she gets to stay late at camp.

I am happy for Spider because he is getting more gigs and he loves his music. It helps him relax since he is working so hard. We are hoping we can see him play on Friday playing down on the intercoastal in Fort Lauderdale.

And what can I say about Aviva...she has been such a big help the past few weeks, like my little nurse. I am so proud of her. She really is a sweet and sensitive child. And she just loves to help whether it be me or anyone.

SO freaking frustrated.........

So we dropped my Jeep off at the dealer to be fixed (only can be fixed with a dealer) because it is the body control module. So Spider dealt with the woman, but we had not heard from her Thursday after he left 2 messages. SO I decided to call and guess what she called back with in 5 minutes. Saying the piece is on order and will be in Friday. Well I called Friday afternoon...guess what no piece. She said for sure will be in Saturday.

So just hung up with Ronnie from the service dept..since Theresa is off today. Went to check on the Jeep for me and said the piece now will not be in till Tuesday. I said is it coming from China...there is FedEx or something. So I am fuming but not with him. I said leave a message for Theresa to call me ASAP on Monday morning.

Is $748 plus tax to fix. Well, she is going to have to do something...either a discount or a loaner car for 2 days. My best friend is coming to town and I need my vehicle.

UGH..this is not helping my back at all.

NOT doing GOOD, Not doing GOOD at ALL...

Well, today was the final attempt to do an injection with a nerve block to see if it would help my back and take away the pain.

SO get there and not feeling hot...well my sugar is 50 and feel miserable and very sweaty. So they get me settled in, meaning into the lovely hospital gown and get the IV going. ANd then give me dextrose to help my sugars. Got up to 111.

They finally take me back and get everything going for the procedure. He gave me a nerve block and hoping that worked.

After the procedure, my sugar was 88 and after apple juice for some reason went to 75. But was feeling all right. Just wanted to get home.

Got home about 2:45 pm and and can feel the area where my pain from getting tight. And then knew that was not a good sign. As the day went on the pain got worse to what it was before the procedure.

I cannot believe this, all I want is some relief. It hurts walking, standing and now feel a bit more when I sit. It is not fair. I want some RELIEF!!!!!!!!! I am not asking much!!!

They call to follow up tomorrow and will tell them. I have an appointment next week with the pain doc and the orthopedist on the same day. I NEED something that is going to work.

GRAINS of GRATITUDE....

Thank you Christine for starting me out on the Grains of Gratitude.....

Aviva has loved the first week of camp. Hard to believe she finished her first week. They had a field trip to Laser Quest. She swims twice a day and does lots of great activities. She loves going and being with her friends. She say she cannot pick just one ctivity because she loves them all.

Spider and Aviva went to Walmart together yesterday for me...gave them a list and they were gone almost 2 hours. But they had fun and she got McDonalds so not bad for her. I enjoyed the quiet time.

My friends have been great this week. Just helping me out by taking Aviva to and from camp. Making it easier for me so I do not have to walk much.

I am thankful for Spider keeping the house clean and doing all the dishes (since the dishwasher broke). Makes it easier on me when he knows I cannot do it.

And we are very thankful that we can celebrate Father's Day with Spider...we are not doing much but we are together and that is most important. He will probably take Aviva out to the pool or Chuck E Cheese. First he went off to the gym!!

Great news for Spider...he picked up 2 gigs per weekend...,so know he will have 3 per weekend. Will definitely help us do some stuff around the house. And we can go see him play since it is at a restaurant down on the water in Fort Lauderdale. Hoping to go next wek. We love to see him play!

UPDATE from the follow-up at the PAIN DOC...

I am going back next Wednesday for one more procedure.

They will insert an block with iodine using a little camera (fluroscope) to see it gets in the joints. If I have no pain after 6 to 8 hours from walking or standing, then they know it works. I will go back and they will burn off the nerve endings. I sure hope that is it because after that it is surgery. I do not want to resort to that.

Successful first day of CAMP.............

(she wore blue but then ate breakfast and got i on her so we changed to the pink top!!!!!!)

First day of camp went perfectly according to Aviva.

She was up at 6:45 am...we did not leave till 8:20 am. She was so excited. She rated it a perfect 10. She has 12 girls in her bunk and she knows 4 of them. Not bad at all.

I was worried she would not eat lunch because she is so picky. Well, she ate and had mac and cheese!!!!!!!!

They swam twice, once for instruction and once for fun. Played soccer and went to arts and crafts.

Wednesday they have their first field trip to Laser Quest!!

GRAINS of GRATITUDE

My grains of gratitude for this week.....thank you to Christine.





*Yesterday as a family we went to a birthday party for a friend of Aviva's...they go all out every year. This year was again Disney but all about water. And had the rock climbing wall too. They had a spread of food like you would not believe and the cake and table were set up really nice. It was nice to the 3 of us. Aviva had a blast. We did not say till the end was late already but they were having fireworks.

*On Friday we had Aviva's camp orientation, she is going to be in the Sparks. And she already knows 4 other girls in her group. So we got meet the cousnelors and found out they go on a trip every week. They swim twice a day once with instruction. Wow what fun she is going to have. It starts tomorrow.

*I have to say that Aviva has been great since I had my epidural on Thursday....she has made the best nurse!! She loves to help. She will get my ice pack and put it on my back or go for things I need. But unfortunately yesterday was torture for me. My back was hurting very bad...it throbs. The walking and standing at the party did not help me at all. Was hoping for some relief. Going to Neurologist Tuesday and follow-up with pain Doc Thursday so hoping for some answers.

*Again have to be thankful to Spider for working so hard, taking care of me and the house. We would be lost with out him. It is a good thing he likes to clean,.,...he cooks and irons too!!!

*And I am very thankful to my friends who have helped me out since it is hard without family here. I wish my dad was down here, I am hoping they still are going to aim for next year because it would be great for Aviva to have grandpa here.

I am definitely getting old...

check out all these doctor appointments:

June 12: Neurologist

June 14: Follow up with the pain doctor

June 22: Consult for Lap Band

June 26: Opthomalogist

June 27: Follow up with Orthopedist

July 5: Cardiologist

July 10: Endocrinologist

I believe that is it unless one doc wants to send me for testing.

I had the epidural yesterday and thought would feel some relief by now but walking today at the orientation for Aviva's camp really hurt and standing and talking definitely was not pleasant. The nurse said could take up to 3 days so hoping it works for me. If not, I am not sure. Endo does not like how it affects my blood sugar....yesterday was a high of 370 today the high got to 478.

I will be bringing my MRI results to the Neurologist to see what he has to say and to discuss nerve testing on legs and the neuropathy of wrists and the carpel tunnel syndrome.

HATE is EVIL...

I could not sleep tonight so I watched Oprah from Wednesday. And I am sitting here in tears...She had stories of hate....one was a young gay man between to almost death as a teenager who ended up working for the Museum of Tolerance in Los Angeles. Who ran into the man who did the beating. He was white aryan who changed his ways and works at the Museum as well. And how they forgave each other and now lecture together.

But the story that left me in tears was the story of 2 women. One was a holocaust survivor and one was the daughter of a Nazi General who killed thousands of Jews. The Jewish woman worked in Monica's father's house for 20 months. Monika found out that Helen was alive and wrote her letter. She wanted to ask for forgiveness. They met in Krakow, Poland for the first time. I think I had tears and cried through the whole piece.

Monica learned how dangerous her father was from the movie Schindler's List and it touched home for me.

See my great great uncle was on Schindler's List but we did not find out till the movie came out. By that time my uncle was in his 90's and did not get out much...so one of is great niece's wrote a letter to Steven Speilberg about him. Well, he sent a representative to my uncle's house with the movie so he can watch it.

They went back to the home were Helen spent 20 months in the house as this evil man's slave starting at the age of 14. She would hear shots from the house this man was shooting innocent people in the streets just because they were Jews. Helen said she felt like she was there all those years ago...

At the end she said Hate is evil and we need to work past and forgive. With out forgiveness there will be always be hate.

And then they did a test at the end on how you respond to words and different colors of people......The Prejudice Test.

An Oprah that should not be missed.

I am a BIT worried.....

I went today to have my epidural. I was a bit nervous because I want it to work so badly.

I am so tired of being in PAIN, it affects everything I do in my life. I do not shop anymore because it hurts so much by the time I am done that I am in tears. I worry about when I go places will it be a long walk and can I do it. Or I have Spider come and he drops me off in front and then parks the car. I want my independence back like before.

So I am home from the epidural for a few hours now, and while getting dinner for Aviva ready my back is in the same pain when standing as yesterday. I pray to G-d that this works. The idea of surgery is scary to me. I have no family around to help out. I do have good friends and so grateful for that.

I just hope by the morning I am feeling some relief.

How AVIVA'S mind works....

Last night we were watching an awards show on ABC. Aviva was playing her game and watching that was until Beyonce came on singing her hit Irreplaceable. Aviva got up to sing and dance along to the song (she is like her daddy when it comes to remembering lyrics),

Well, the part came up to the left to the left. So all the fans were waving their hands to the left along with Beyonce. So Aviva goes mommy they are not waving to the left they are going to the right (very good observing on her part). I explained to her that yes they were going to the left but on camera it looks to the right. She goes NO MOMMY they are going to the right. So again tried to explain and she looked and me and said they are just wrong.

Gave me a good laugh how she was following along!!

How about some MAXI and JEFFREY.....

that is Maxi Priest and Jeffrey Osbourne....we went to an outdoor concert and had a blast on Saturday. We love Maxi, back in 1992 when Spider was in Japan he played on the same show as Maxi. So he went backstage to say hi!!! They had some local artists perform and Valerie Tyson was great and full of energy!! The DJ with Maxi Priest is Red Fox we saw him perform 14 years ago with Shaggy before Shaggy was big!!













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GRAINS of GRATITUDE.........

Thank you Christine......for the Grains....

What a great week in our household.....we officially have a KINDERGARTEN GRADUATE!!!!!!!!!! It is hard to believe that Aviva finished...she is gettingbig way to f ast for our liking. We are so very proud of her. Hard to believe how far she has come.

Yesterday we were lucky to spendthe ay as a family and went to a concert outdoors...we got to see Maxi Priest and Jeffrey Osbourne as well as a few local artists. We had a great time (will be posting video clips soon). Aviva fell asleep even with all that loud music.

Finally the doctors are listening to me and i will get my epidural on Thursday. That is as long as I have permission from the endocrinologist......because of how high my sugars got the last itme. Hoping for some relief.

I was able to make all my Disney Dining reservations for our trip in November. Got all I wanted and the times. Even booked Aviva into the Sandcastle Club while Spider and I go for dinner for our anniversary at the Californa Grill.....now hoping to get a window seat so we can see the fireworks from Wishes while we eat. It is for our 11 anniversary.

We have a week off before camp starts...looking forward to sleeping in, and spending time with Aviva! We go Friday for camp orientation. We already know she is a bunk with at least 3 of her friends.

Aviva's end of the year party.......

UPDATE on my visit to the pain doc....

finally I got them to agree to something to help me. I will be having an epidural (more steroids) on Thursday. That is as long as I have the OK from the endocrinologist. Because steroids make blood sugars go very high...mine went extremely high the last time!

So fingers crossed all goes well and I can have it Thursday.

Back to the pain specialist today...cannot live like this...

it is not fair that my life is basically on hold or cannot do much because of how the pain is when walking and standing. They want to wait till the nerve testing results are in....but so far just on my hands have been done and results are not in yet. Well not good enough for me. He is worried because sugar got to 412, but before I had the injection they never told me or consulted with my endocrinologist to come up with a plan.

I am so frustrated.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Grandpa.......

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LETS GO METS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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TODAY I go for.....

another endoscopy to find out if the inflammation in my esophagus is. And how the Nexium helped.

Then calling the pain doc tomorrow because I cannot live with this pain much longer. I had the nerve testing done on my hands but not on legs yet (insurance reasons). I cannot wait for results for both, they have to do something for the pain. Living like this is really killing me. I dread going out because of the pain. It is so rough. Just thinking about it makes me cry.

America's Next Top Model for Disney that is...

GRAINS of GRATITUDE...

Well it hs been an a pretty good week in our houehold. So here is a look back at what I am grateful for. Thanks Christine.

Well, I actually got an evening out for dinner at Macaroni Grill courtesy of Aviva's teacher. Some of the kindergarten teachers took their room moms out for dinner to thank them for a wonderful year. When I believe we should be thanking Aviva's teacher for a terrific year Aviva had. What a change in Aviva from August till now. She has done amazingly well this year.

Yesterday according to Aviva we had mommy-daughter time. We went to the park and stayed till after 7 pm. She had a picnic with her favorite McDonald's and we brought her bike. She rode and played and played and rode. He definitely wore herself out. It was a beautiful evening too!

Today after daddy wakes up (he did the overnight) it will be daddy-daughter time. I believe they are going to an arcade (like Kaooms or Chuck E Cheese). They wll give me a few hours alone which is always nice. And they love those games and the noise much more then me.

Hard to beleve the last day of school is Thursday....this year went by so fast. I will have a first grader it is so hard to believe. She started life at 3 lbs and look at her now! She improved 100% in her handwriting, reading at a 2nd grade level and is doing addition and subtraction in math. Forget she is writing simple essays too!! Who wuld have thought they do all that in kindergarten!

I am still here with constant back pain so will be calling again the pain clinic. I had nerve testing on my hands done Thursday (need legs too but insurance won't pay for both at the same time). Let me tell you not pleasant at all. But something has to be done.,...cannot go on another week or more like this. Spider has been amazing..shopping, cleaning and just taking care of everything I used to do. Oh nd working lots of overtime!! I truly love him for all he has done. Tuesday have another endoscopy and he will take me again on very little sleep!! What a lucky girl I am to have him!!

The Many Faces of Aviva

PROCRASTINATION pays off......

well sometimes.

I got a 23/25 on my paper and I am thrilled with that. She really liked it, but had a few minor things with the APA format.

I am happy!!!

GRAINS of GRATITUDE.......

What a week it has been in our household...Thank you Christine......

1. What a great time the 3 of us had at Family Fun Day at Aviva's school. She was so happy that we both were able to attend. She served us breakfast. We watched a great DVD of pictures from throughout the year. We all had tears in our eyes. Our children have come so far this year. It truly helps that we had an amazing teacher.

2. I am thankful for Spider for taking over many of the house responsibilities...like the cooking and cleaning. And he has done it with out complaining. So yesterday I sent him grocery shopping with a blank check...mind you when I shop I spend $70 a week well he spent...are you siting down? $156 for the three of us. Frm now if he shops he gets cash and cannot go over that amount!! But do appreciate him doing the shopping.

3. I am so happy that I got my paper done on Somebody Else's Kids. You have to read this book if you have not. It is the year in he life of a special educaion teacher with 4 totally different students.

4. I am very thankful that Aviva has been so good to me and helpful all at the same time. I am in such agony with my back and she is so understanding. She will help around the house and rubs my back to make me feel better.

5. And happy to say we are going to see Shrek the 3rd today as a family. We are all looking forward to some good laughs!!!

NO MORE PRCRASTINATION for ME....

Just finished a paper on the book Somebody Else's Kids by Torey Hayden. It is due one hour from now (11:55 pm). The book is really good. I did a 6 page paper and a PowerPoint presentation, started at 5 pm and finished at 9:45 pm.

NO more procrastination...will begin the next project Monday and will finish way before it is due!

Torey Hayden is a great author.....I highly recommend her!

FAMILY Fun Day at Aviva's School

What a great day Family Fun Day was...Aviva took us to breakfast in the classroom. We watched a Photo CD of the photos some of the moms and I took. It was put to music and each child got one with their picture on it. What a great momento to have o remember the amazing year we had with Mrs. Gonshak. After that the children sang to us. Finally, they were so excited to go all over the kindergarten wing and outside to have fun at the fun centers. It was a lot of fun!


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An UPDATE but still no relief.....

So off I went this morning to the pain doctor...took 45 minutes instead of 20 due to rain and bad drivers. Then I get there and no parking so I parked in what seems another country. It was not but my back cannot take the walking.

So I saw the doctor (not mine) and explained what was going on. I am have some tingly feeling and numbness in my feet and hands. So he took more info and then another doc came in the head guy. He said before considering an epidural he wants me to talk to the endocrinologist about peripheral neuropothy. He wants them to do some nerve testings before deciding how to proceed. He does not want to do the epidural and then not work. I said I just want to walk with out pain.

Being diabetic he has to take extra precaution. When they gave me the injection on Thursday never told me my sugars would go very high like 412. And she should have told me to talk to the endo first. So have to be careful if getting steroids again.

So at my appointment this afternoon with the endo....he decided that he can do the nerve testing at his office since they are coming May 24th. And if needed will send me to a neurologist. Makes it easier then having to wait to see a neurologist and scheduling with them.

Meanwhile changed my metformin to 1000 mg twice a day and added the insulin Lantus took away Novolin N and changed Novolog to three times a day!!

So I am still in pain and not sure how much longer I can take it. But from now on Spider will be doing the shopping and errands.

PAIN PAIN will not go away...

The injection in the SI Joint did nothing to help the pain. I am in agony and even worse then before. Walking in my house now hurts. Had to go to Walmart to get my insulin and did not think I was going to make it back to the car. The sweat was building up on my head and the pain in my back was miserable and I got to the car and cried. I cannot do this anymore.

I cannot have fun with Aviva and take her places. I need this to be resolved. I just want to walk and stand with out pain.

I go tomorrow for a follow up at 9 am. Prayers please.

GRAINS of GRATITUDE

Happy Mother's Day!!!! I hope all the mom's had a special day with their familis.

I am so thankful for my small family. They made my day very special. From the lovely cards they gave me and Aviva writing (all by herself) such beautiful messages. Aviva read each one to me. And then they gave me a power vacuum for the car (I believe this was more for Spider then me), She also made some awesome things at school for me. I love the handmade items so much. She was so proud of what she did.

We actaully spent the whole weekend together. Which meant alot to me. It is always nice to have us home together and having a nice time. And best of all, they made me breakfast today.

Spider let me rest and cleaned the whole house!! He also did laundry and folded the clothes. I am still in a lot of pain with my back. And Spider took good care of me. While he took care of the house and helped with Aviva.

It is hard to believe the school year is almost over...only 12 1/2 more days....and my baby will soon be a first grader....it is very hard to believe. What a year it has been,

Thank you agan Christine for the Grains of Gratitude.

Lots going on....so here is an update....

First off, had the injections in my back yesterday....was hoping to feel some relief right off....but not yet...was in a lot of pain today. Had to go to Walmart for my insulin and the walking still really hurts. And took Aviva to the pool at our complex today with friends....wow that walk was a doozy for me....I just want some relief I pray for the pain to go away.

The was told last week my insurance would cover the Lap-Band surgery and then this week they said NO....and it is a contract exclusion so cannot even fight it. It is very sad. But maybe I have a long lost relative or someone, a friend maybe who has an extra $15,000 laying around....I will pay it back :). I can have $5000 by end of August....so going to talk to the doctor found a great surgeon. Went to a seminar on Tuesday, and filled out the paper work on the computer and waiting to hear back. So hoping to get financing if no relative comes forward. Oh and will play the lottery too, never know....think positive for me.

I also received an amazing book in the mail today called GIFTS...written by parents of child with Down Sydrome. I have some friends who contributed stories to the book. I cannot wait to read it....I think this is a must read for everyone and especially those in the field of exceptional student educaton.

Aviva was the only one in her class to earn enough points in Accelerated Reader to get an invite to the JUNGLE party. Had to have 12 points and Aviva had 12.2 points..I believe she read like 25 books. I am very proud of her. The party is Monday....and hard to believe only12 1/2 more days of kindergarten!